iamDrukpa

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Happy Birthday!


Dear Mipham,
Jesus! Time does fly is an expression adults (SO CALLED) often use to illustrate the bewilderment of life and its assorted vicissitudes….I was thinking the same thing for a pretty long time…and today it seems that much more in context and in its urgency. But I go through this every September the 18th, ‘cos that was the day you chose to make your entrance onto this stage we call life.
Imagine! The inception of the whole conception! During my Dharma Bum days I’d read and had my share of the wisdom memorabilia that is the unsaid pre-requisite to becoming a wholly and fully fledged Dharma Bum. It brought me no Nirvana and neither do I understand what Samsara is (I know it’s a good film made by an Indian with Tibetan/Ladaki actors) but beyond that wrapper? I’ll confess I’m clueless…
But the point was the passage of time and how time just flies even though you don’t see it…although paradoxically we do see it all around us; the changing days and nights to the changing seasons and transformers. For me, you are probably the best example of the passage of time, as I’m to my mother.
There used to be this idea in my head and its till there…on occasion I’d tell you this little fictional anecdote about how you, among a billion other probable Miphams, managed to out-fox and out-swim them all to get to where you now stand today – a lovely boy who’ll soon be a teen, do the school and the college and find your own warm spot on god’s beautiful earth.
“The boy is the father of man” is another expression that I find absolutely confounding! But its life’s ways and means of taunting and teasing us I guess…irony being its punchiest sense of humor!
I’m sitting in my office…haven’t had a bite and did a couple of flashes of whisky last night…you see, it was the first day of Thimphu Tsechu (those colorful festivals held in honor of the Guru’s teachings and to further the fruition of the practice of the Dharma practitioners). It was also Vishwa Karma Puja, another festival held in honor of one of the Hindu Gods. I got up this morning knowing you were still asleep (Bhutan is +5hrs ahead). The devotees of the Hindu Gods today take to the streams and rivers to immerse the idol, concluding the worship and the ceremony…and as they go about the immersion procedure, they get into big open trucks holding the idols and singing in the lord’s glory … It was almost a chant of “Happy Birthday to you Mipham” to my ears….
The tsechu goes on for another three days…today’s day two and the dances of the Dharma are in full swing. People dress in their best and still I associate that with your birthday; a celebration of sorts…and to any other person that shares your birthday today, this day of joyous contemplation and rejuvenation.
Birthdays were not a big deal with me and my generation…but I can see and sense rebirth and reincarnation, and perhaps that’s what birthdays actually do or should do…
Look at me! IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY and I’m already reincarnating into a lovable-loathsome-philosopher-dad and that’s because you have made me remember many things I’d forgotten…
But there’s one thing I’ll never forget, and that’s you making your entrance on this day, the 18th of September and as long as I’m alive, you’ll have given me so much just because you are here…and I pray that may every birthday bring you closer to a positive avatar, pausing and rejoicing and reincarnating unto higher realms of consciousness so that it looks and feels like the whole world is celebrating with you…may gods bless you and keep you…
all my love…

Thursday, August 19, 2010

In Loving Letters

Dear M,
Forgive me my weariness and laziness for not being prompt in our correspondence. I was too scared to get into the intimate details or rather I chickened out of what I thought would be situations I might not be able to handle.
It’s nice to see you growing up to be a real boy (even if a part of me wishes you wouldn’t because really, I think the childhood part is probably the best memory any adult would carry). But there are forces other than our dillydallying at work and they change the rules for no one. There is a lot of stuff I could get into if I now got carried away, so forgive me once again for killing whatever spontaneity attempts to spring up. I’m so aware of the importance of physical time spent together that I’m scared, really, that you might see me differently, rely on me lesser and lesser, until there is no need for me to be a part of your life.
Forgive me again for saying that, I think I’m telling you the worst case scenarios I’ve thought about and been scared about. Let’s switch the subject.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Return of the Prodigal Son


Preparations
Having been a bit of a rebel against hide-bound traditions, I found myself as far away from Bhutan as possible in my 20s. I joined the ranks of a small handful of Bhutanese who made their lives in the West— Amsterdam, in my case. Why did I leave my place of my birth? Who truly knows? Perhaps, it was the allure of individualism and perceived opportunity, as many of my friends thought. To my mother it was fate. I myself would have to go with the fact that I have this love-hate relationship with the simultaneously nurturing and oppressive social fabric that makes Bhutan both reassuring and unbearable for persons of a certain ilk.

In any event, having emerged on the other side of the globe, I briefly found the freedom from the cultural Bhutanese “soup of things” heady and refreshing. But lately this excitement was turning, as it eventually does for most Bhutanese living overseas, into something that might literally be termed the “Unbearable Lightness of Being”, the initial euphoria of freedom replaced by a sneaking sense of dislocation. For truly, the pull of home is strong for any Bhutanese born on native ground, and the familiar scents and sounds, the food, and the ties that bind, as I eventually learned, are not that easy to disengage.

And thus here was my peace offering to my family.

I was bringing home my beautiful four-year old son, Mipham, to learn some Bhutanese ways that I hoped would ground him amid the vicissitudes of a multicultural life that lay ahead of him.

As we sat in our apartment in Amsterdam, preparing for the 11-hour flight to Bangkok that would precede the five more hours to Bhutan, I couldn’t help thinking of how his grandmother Angay Deki, in particular, saw this as Mipham’s initiation into the Bhutanese way of life.
I couldn’t agree more. Irrespective of the outcome, I had the feeling that memories such as the ones he was likely to have from this trip would serve him well as he got older and more inquisitive about his mixed heritage.


En-route
The flight was a long and tiring affair but an overnight in Bangkok somewhat eased the jetlag and jangled nerves. The next morning back in the cool comfort of the airport Mipham is increasingly excited as I complete the formalities to board our flight.

The flight to Paro via Kolkota is pleasant, as always. Funny thing about flying on the only airline of a small country is that you know everyone as soon as you board the flight— the pilots, the stewards and stewardesses and even your co-passengers. It’s like arriving home before your plane has even landed!

Excitement now hangs thick in the air as the plane descends within sight of the beautiful snow capped peaks and hills of Bhutan. Emerging from the plane, we inhale the fresh mountain air, soaking in the peace and the serenity.


Home
The lone road winds its way through the fertile paddy fields of rice and apple orchards, past the Pa Chhu (river). Then it cuts through the two-street town reminiscent of a Hollywood western with its opposite line of facing shops and stores selling everything from liquor, betel nuts, dried hard cheese cubes and Lays Frito Chips. We pass the imposing ramparts of Rinpung Dzong, the administrative and monastic heart of the region. There’s the colorful little cantilever bridge I have crossed far too many times to mention. It’s a lovely sensation seeing all the unchanged landmarks of my childhood in the space the short drive to my mother’s home.

Home is a typical Bhutanese farmhouse, very decorative and surprisingly large. Ours looks big on the outside but is rather spare inside, at least compared to the electronic and commercial knickknacks that fill up western apartments. The cattle shed that used to be on the ground floor of the two-storey house has recently been moved away from the main building as part of the government’s drive to improve rural hygiene. The very top rafters— the open space between the roof and the ceiling— is used to dry hay, long strips of beef, sides of pork cut like bacon strips (only thicker), and dried red chilli peppers. But the middle section of the house is where all the action happens.

Our first real Bhutanese meal in far too long a time arrives with the huge requisite mound of rice heaped on traditional wooden bowls called Daapaas, and accompanied by a delicious and spicy stew of beef and pork. To wash it down we have Suja or salted butter tea and yoghurt.

Then we make the customary trip to the family shrine.

Mipham and I bow before the series of statues and images representing the Buddhas, enlightened teachers and gods and goddesses representing the various aspects of wisdom, compassion and all things good and wonderful. We offer thanks for a safe trip back home, continued good health and good fortune.

As in all Bhutanese homes the kitchen in my family is the focal point of all activity. And activity we have aplenty, given our somewhat celebrated arrival. Word has gone around and pretty soon the friends and neighbors begin to pour in. The kitchen is frenetic, watched over my mother who orchestrates everything with the finesse of a conductor performing before the philharmonic. At one corner, hearty flatbread chapattis are being rolled out by the dozens and baked. Children come and go, adding to the melee. Grown ups do the talking. Conversations cover just about everything under the sun.

“How are things in your life?”

“What is life like there compared to here?”

“What’s been going on in the world?”

“Who’s been promoted in the civil service?”

“Who’s getting married?”

“Any births?”

“Who’s dead?”

“And who’s not?”

Paying Respects
Today is Mipham’s first morning after. Angay Deki has made arrangements for Mipham to experience as much of the culture as possible during his stay. She firmly believes he should not be denied the Buddhist way of life. First stop is nearby Kyichu Monastery, one of the most revered temples in the kingdom, and the oldest (circa 7th century AD). The day is an auspicious one. Monks are inside the main altar chanting prayers and mantras. Locals and visitors mingle to pay homage, garner good karma, and offer butter lamps, prostrations and circumambulations.

The colorful prayers wheels along the temple’s walls are spun for good karma, providing a good excuse for walking meditation. At the temple’s entrance an elderly Gomchhen, or Buddhist mendicant, greets us. There are other devotees too, spinning hand-held prayer wheels and chanting the sacred prayers. Young and old alike circumambulate the temple, spinning built-in prayer wheels with good wishes on their lips and warmth in their eyes, walking clockwise, in the traditional Buddhist custom.

Next stop is the base of Rinpung Dzong where, according to legend, a wandering yogi some centuries ago took up residence, eventually becoming the valley’s spiritual protector. As children of this locality, we are required to pay our respects to the Ney, or “Holy Ground.”

Back at home another hot meal awaits us. Everyone sits cross-legged in a sort of semi-circle around the matriarch— Angay Deki– who is literally the “Provider-in-Chief”.

Time Pass
It’s the weekend and after a nice midday meal there’s nothing better than a hand of “Marriage”, an intricate game of cards that has my captivated my family and the nation alike. Everyone’s playing it. The family plays for small change and for fun— a relaxing way to idle away the afternoon hours. Doma, the traditional Bhutanese chew, is duly passed around. Mildly intoxicating and seriously habit forming, it stains our teeth and lips a scarlet hue. According to traditional belief, the leaf is supposed to represent human skin, the betel nut a shrunken human skull, and the lime the gray matter of the brain. Chewing the doma and spewing out the “blood”, which results from the catalysis of nut, leaf and lime, is believed to be better than cannibalism.

Learning
One day Angay Deki takes Mipham, his cousins Kitso and Tobden, who are of a similar age, to the residence of Trulku Kinga, a reincarnate Tibetan Lama. Trulku Kinga shows us around his monastery and speaks of his journey from Tibet to India and Bhutan. He recounts without resentment memories of leaving Tibet, as if that was that and this is this.

Dusk sets in, announced by the buzzing of insects, birds chirping to their nests and the loud, if invisible, cicadas. The night sky is a sprinkling of stars. The skies seem closer, somehow, and smaller than in Holland. Perhaps it’s the fact that we’re deep in the mountains.

Now children are gathering in front of the television set. The 1998 world cup finals in France demanded that satellite television be introduced. Four years later with the 2002 World Cup Finals in Japan and Korea and Bhutan had joined the satellite fraternity. Local cable operators in partnership with Indian companies now beam around 40 channels ranging from HBO to CNN, BBC to ESPN and dozens more. The debate over whether this is a good or bad thing is pretty hot in these highlands.

True Return
Each morning Mipham and I watch Angay Deki rise, wash up and fill the seven water bowls, an offering to the Buddhas. She milks the cows and brings the first cup home to the shrine.

She keeps count of the hundreds of thousands of prostrations she has completed with her prayer beads and the use of special stones. Every day she concludes her devotions with a retreat to this sacred room.

Mipham tries his hand at prayer wheels. All Bhutanese children learn this the simple way, by play. They imitate what they see and hear around them, until they begin to get the deeper significance of such things.

One day Angay Deki has just completed her evening prayers. She’s sitting down facing the altar, reading from the scriptures. Now the kids want to re-enact the scene. They just imitate what they see. Cousin Tobden, especially, seems fond of Angay’s rituals. He also imitates Buddhist mask dances and speaks of becoming a monk. It seems apropos that he’s in the altar room pretending he’s a lama seated in the lotus position. Soon Mipham follows suit. I think of how these innocent acts of repetition are reinforcing experiences the children will carry into their adulthood. I think of all the years that I likely did the very same things.

Watching the children at play with a quiet contentment creeping up on me, I realize that although I have wandered far and distant along the way, I have finally returned home to my Bhutanese roots.

Mipham smiles at me as if in agreement.
By Jurmi Chhowing
~

Sketches By Jimmy Mipham Chhowing

iamTHE WALRUS
Gonna EatYa Mousy!
I'll Vulture U
Rocky Racoon













Rocky Racoon










They Call Me Mr Sher Khan

Dragon's Breath & Dinner













Its a Jungle Out Here
I Like TO Move It Move It

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Stormy Breeze


















I hear the garbled sounds of memories; they hush me by like a gentle breeze;

The breeze is gone and fierce storms blow my wonted vaults and their assorted jeweleries.

Contradictions of various mathematical possibilities leave me flat and hung.

Notions of freedom leave me trapped and all these I sought to reveal or find during my natural born years.
The hair I play with today thins;
The knuckles I crack wrinkles;
The eyes staring me back hollows in empty delight.

Knowing me today is no more familiar than knowing me yesterday.

These woeful songs would have you beguiled and fooled.
The treachery of our minds are just the tip of the mail-berg;
For the base stays grounded in drama and the ensuing hullabaloo is all a part and parcel of our own karma.

There is nothing more left to seek;
There is nothing more left to heed.

I look at me in the pupils of my eyes!
They glisten back inundated with lingering hurtful memories of causes that have resulted in innumerable bruises.

“What did you want, My Sun?”
“Meaning, I guess”
“What kind of meaning, My Moon?”
“The kind that satisfies curiosity, restlessness, boredom, yearning, desire, vanity and emptiness I guess”
“And where did you suppose you’d find them, My Celestial Star?”
“In books, in knowledge, in history, in travels and in love”
“And did you, My Dear Immortal?”
“I thought I did. In the beginning there was curiosity, then there was longing and finally there was the experience”
“And you found the meaning, My Dear Seeker?”
“No”
“Are you still looking for it, My Fearless Warrior?”
“No”
“And why not? My Wealthy Landlord?”
“Because it’s everywhere”
“And did that insight help, My Liege?”
“No. It did not”
“Why not, My Master?”

Because my questions were wrong;
Because the basis of my wandering itself was conceived in ignorance:
Because my yearning for love was fueled by hatred:
Because my very accumulation of knowledge was founded on brittle sticks of ignorance.

I had not known how to love because I had never abandoned the selfishness I carried with such smugness.

I read the sutras and it gave me pride;
I read the classics and they gave me knowledge;
I traveled far and wide and that gave me mileage;
I made good company with females and that left me inflated;
I lived because I needed to do all of that again;
And that made me sad.

I wasn’t alone, I was lonely.
You see, love I echoed aplenty and recognized none;

Today I reap the fruits of my indolence;
Today I taste the bitterness of my nectar;
Today wisdom peeps and my knowledge shudders;
Today truth beckons and I freeze;
Today I’m learning to live with unease.

"Well. Now You Know, My Son, Now You Know!"

Ps: YourLustForLifeStartsRightNow!

Pastoral



Old Men Tell Their Tales,
Over Hearths Villagers Listen;
The Quiet Forest Laughs!


Terraced-clouds-field the big-blue skies,
Like quiet feathered snowflakes.
Nights-glow with fireflies;
The sky glitters as the stars litter;

The freshness of reviving showers on oily monsoon days,
The sweet fragrance of blooming flowers,
Of myriad colors painting unknown horizons,
Of shy settings, orange sunsets and silhouetted mountains,
Of strange moonlit-karmic recollections;

Here we are;
Rainbows and all…






Ps: YourLustForLifeStartsRightNow!

Reflections









The Misty Road Lives,
It Winds And Tells You Stories,
If You Will Listen...



The Monsoons Are Fresh,
Raindrops They Take Me Places,
Showering Secrets!


We Are All Poets,
Though We Loot, Plunder and Steal,
We Are Still Poets.

The Women I Love,
Come In Lovely Disguises,
How They Torture Me!

Loneliness My Friend,
Why Are You Always With Me?
Go See Some Body!

The Monsoons Are Dry,
Yet We Know That It Will Rain;
That Is Refreshing!

Don't Give Up On Me,
Life Works In Mysterious Ways,
SomeDay You Will See...

You Called Me Jurmi,
And We Used To Hang About,
It Was All Good Fun!
Though I Miss You Bad,
I Remember Times We Had,
You Are a Good Lad!

Even If i Die,
Life Around Me Will Flourish,
Now That Is Living!